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Dear Nancy,
What are some easy ways to start taking back control of our lives and our feelings?
Here are some winning reframes from some of my coaching sessions that shows how we can change our state simply by changing and elevating the words!
"We crashed into a fence ... "We french kissed the rail!"
"I'm so busy, I'm just treading water." .... "I'm practicing my synchronized swimming (and focusing on pointing my toes!!)"
"After one trauma after another; I'm hanging by a thin thread" .... "With each incident, I got stronger, so now I'm like Tarzan; having fun flying through the jungle on strong, thick ropes!"
"I'm taking shit on all sides of me." ... "I'm hunting for the hidden joy that is surrounding me."
"I've always felt like there was something missing inside of me." ... "There's alwways room to add the additional gifts in life that I will be receiving."
"Those girls didn't say anything to me when I walked by; they don't like me." ... "They were so happy to see me, they were speechless!"
"When my fiancee left me for another woman, I felt rejected." .... "Glad she took out the trash for me, and I'm grateful that I dodged a bullet!"
"When my father passed away, I felt like the rug had been ripped out from under me." .... "Thanks to him, I'm a strong successful adult now, so now my life is a magic carpet ride."
"I am afraid of being alone." ... "I love peace and quiet, doing whatever I want, and not being triggered and stressed all the time."
You get the point ...
I have a long list of statements that my clients and I come up with in our "creative" sessions!
It's all about taking back control, laughing, and out-strategizing the "enemy" in our heads!
We don't have to stay with the REALITY of life or the "truth" of what we are feeling.
We don't have to frame everything from a disempowered, victim point of view.
We can generate more empowering feelings just by changing the words ... which will change the emotional impact.
No, you don't have to buy into and 100 percent believe the new statements you are saying to yourself ...
(Note that you believed the old statements that weren't necessarily true either! You had just told yourself a story that it was the truth!)
So, that is proof right there that whatever you choose to decide to believe ...
If you program your brain over and over with new words and statements, you will eventually believe those as well!
And then THAT will become your new truth!
We are NOT out of control when it comes to our lives and how we feel.
And remember, how we feel is what our horses will experience from us.
Horses don't like the chaos and uncertainty of the world anymore than we do!
But in many cases, they are even more sensitive and reactive to it all.
So it is up to us to recycle all that crap out there in the world ... and in our own small worlds!
We need to bring the certaintity. And the empowerment.
And the smiles to our riding!
Humor is the best pattern interupt and one of the best ways to change our state.
Change your language and change your focus!
You are in charge of your life.
Regardless of what others would try to control or to have you to believe.
Stay courageous and strong!
Nancy Dye
Breakthrough Mental Skills Coach
Emotional Strength & Resiliency Trainer
Stratetic Interventionist
1-561-866-0402
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